Originally published in The Evergreen Review Issue 116 in 2008.
FROM STUYVESANT BEE, MAY 2008
STATUS: Insert coin for extra life
A Few Simple Dreams
Are you tired? If so, skip to #5.
#1. Of morning and evening smoke rising in sleepy little towns and pueblos.
#2. Of chuck wagon cooking fires out on the range.
#3. Of campfires by the singing trout stream.
#4. Have jolly picnic fires on the mesa and in the canyon.
#5. Of the tall yarns around the glowing campfire.
CRANBERRY-FRUIT-NUT bread is a favorite fall treat in Cape Cod, but it is also a good feast for any fest. My mom made this every fall. Trust me, if you can't have Thanksgiving on Cape Cod, this is the next best thing!!
VOTE NOW: GROUNDHOG MEAT or GROUND HOGMEAT
FROM STUYVESANT BEE, JUNE 2008
EASY LOBSTER RABBIT: You will need a plate. You will need a saucepan. You will need two cans of Welsh rabbit. You'll need a can opener to open them because you're going to make Easy Lobster Rabbit. So you're going to need one 5- or 6-ounce can of lobster, cubed and drained. You're going to need mushrooms, 3 ounces of sliced broiled mushrooms. You're going to need a small pan with a handle. So you better have thatóthat little pan with the handle. You're going to need a small pan with a handle. You're going to need hot toast points. Okay, let's just recap really quickly, and just move things, really fast, fast as you can. You will need a small plate. You will need rabbit, lobster, mushrooms, white wine, hot toast points. A can opener. Dinner in 45 minutes? It's possible! Delicious? Of course! Mealtime, on time, will be no problem with Easy Rabbit Lobster.
FROM STUYVESANT BEE, JULY 2008
-----------------------------Not long enough
GA-GA-GAMES. Chess is one of the most DIFFICULT of all games to play. Each of the pieces has its own special way of moving. Another DIFFICULT game is bridge. There are over 50 cards and a good percentage of them have to be held in one hand so that your opponent doesn't see them. An Indian game called Gauntlet is ANOTHER DIFFICULT GAME TO PLAY.
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ARE YOU A FAN OF __________?
Are you a fan of religion jokes?
What, pray tell, beats this old chestnut:
What was the last thing Jesus said up there on the cross? He
said, "Hey, I can see
my house from here!"
::I remember chenille bedspreads. However, I'm not sure when I found out it was called chenille. Go figure.